Monday, March 19, 2007
Waleed Mohammed bin Attash, long suspected of plotting the bombing of the USS Cole, confessed at a hearing in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, to planning the attack, according to a Pentagon transcript released Monday.
This has enraged the world champion confessor, alleged 9/11 mastermind Khalid Shaikh Mohammed, or KSM as he has become known. The mainstream media darling was planning to open the confession gig 'confest 2007' with confessing to being the 'mastermind' behind the audacious attack, and to providing the equipment, personnel and even to piloting the craft and being killed in the attack!
The Pentagon sponsored event is expected to attract the cream of international terrorism patsies to confess to both solved and unsolved crimes before an audience of heckling conservative rednecks. As a special treat, Pentagon spokesperson said that there would be some extra surprises at this years event and hinted at spectacular expose's of who created the 'face' on Mars and how crop circles are really formed.
This Year's CONFEST is set to be the biggest and best for years, with the staff at the Pentagon having worked overtime diligently preparing the confessions for this years show.
"We have really pushed the boat out this year and utilised every tool at our disposal to come up with the most amazing collection of confessions possible." said a Guantanamo spokesperson, on the condition of annonimity. "This year is set to be the best year for confessions we have ever had."
However, speculation was quashed about an amazingly spectacular confession by the Israelis at this years show. "The attack on the USS Liberty will not be in this years show, and anyone that is claiming it is, is a dirty anti-semite and a friend of the terrorists." Said the spokesperson.
Well we should not expect miracles now, should we?